When I think of Illinois, of course Abe Lincoln comes to mind, but shortly after that, I think of all those wonderful John Hughes films that took place in the suburbs of Chicago. In light of the new road kill laws passed in that wonderful state I have the following suggestions:

In the remake of “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” let me suggest some small, but truly enhancing changes. When the parking attendants take the Ferrari for a joy ride, and they take that jump and we get the awesome undercarriage shot, have them take out a deer. Then they can be all excited about the new road kill law in Illinois. How about when Sloan is describing Abe Froman, the Sausage King of Chicago, instead of “leather jacket,” she can say, “road kill jacket.” Or, the scene where Cameron kicks the car off the jack and out the back of the garage let it land on a beaver. Everyone loves good beaver meat.

Illinois has joined some 14 other states, making it legal to retrieve road kill for the purpose of pelt or food. People with the correct license are now able to remove road kill from the roads. First they must contact the state to get a furbearer’s license. Then, the animal hit needs to be in season. The law went into effect at the beginning of the year. So, to all those on the Illinois roads: Happy hunting! (Just kidding, the other stipulation is that the animal needs to be legitimately killed accidently.) For more information about the Illinois furbearer license click here.

–Tim Snarr